I am going to start with my personal experience of counselling, I will try to keep it short as I have a habit of relaying the great changes, understanding and the real plus sides of counselling and psychotherapy with it’s up sides. I felt I was becoming an angry person and I felt a sense of disappointment with the person I was becoming. I felt confused and a longing for change but having no real way of how or what really needed to be addressed.
There where some traumatic events that had happened in my life and a lot of loss in my teenage years which I realised I had not gone through the grieving cycle at all I felt I had dismissed them events an emotional point of view. I didn’t really know my or accept a major part of myself, in particular my emotional side.
I had built up a really harsh exterior which was a great defense mechanism. I rejected my own vulnerability. This wasn’t working to well I felt confused, lost, doubting my own decision, my mental health was suffering. I was not comfortable in my own head. Being “me” became exhausting.
I engaged with a couple of counsellors. For me the relationship did not feel right I did not gel with them. I knew I need to carry on to find myself so I found a counsellor where I felt that the relationship would go from strength to strength. It took sometime for me to engage in the therapeutic work but the experience drew me in.
Through the whole experience working through getting to really know me and understand a lot of my decisions through life. My new knowledge gave me the opportunity to mold, accept or change. Understanding “me” on a how I experienced life and being able to understand what I needed. Being in a therapeutic relationship that should me no judgment, a safe and congruent place to be.
I found a whole new me, which sounds cliche but I did. Working tough the things I did not or could not change.